It’s hard out there for a person, any person really to makes friends. For example, I’m not one to make friends very easily, because I don’t really trust anybody at all, but slowly, I’ll let my guard down and welcome them into my world. However, when that friend turns out to be the opposite of what you thought they were, then you end up looking like a fool and a failure. Failure because you let this person in your exclusive world and shared thing with them only to find out later, that they thought it was more than just a friendship, which to me is all I have ever thought it was going to be. I also feel like a damn fool for believe that someone you became close with, was actually a savage in sheep clothing. Maybe I blame myself for extending my friend beyond what; I thought it would be. However, how are you supposed to know when to have boundaries, with a person you’ve thought was a brother? I guess, I’ll never really know the cause of this crash and burn of a relationship, but now all I can go is let it be and see how it turns out, because that’s the only thing to do and you can’t over think it or it will eat you alive. Trust me when I say it will, because I am true testimony to what is it to over things to the point of no return. Then when you wake up and realized what you have done, the damage has be done and you can do nothing but just let it be. Give it sometime; give it some space, not just for that person but for yourself as well.
I sometimes think I’m crazy lucky for having beautiful friends. Who lets me dress them up and take pictures of them. As if we we’re doing a fashion shoot. I’ve always been in love and obsessed with fashion magazine (Full disclosure: I have a storage unit full of magazines…sad I know). For career day in the third grade, I wanted to dress up as Anna Wintour. I had the bobbed hair cut (Wig of course), Chanel sunglasses (Fake of course), ready to present my report on “How I wanted to be an editor at Vogue”. However, my dad wasn’t so fond of having his little boy; dressed to the nine’s in fabulous drag. Therefore, I ended up going as a doctor… story of my life.
Back to the picture: I took this picture and many more of my friend Natalie. A couple of weeks ago, however out of all the pictures taken. I love this one the best. I call it the Sweetest Kill, because that was the song playing when I took this picture.