Tulips 

I sometimes feel, as if this is how the inside of my head runs. However, it always nice to have a nice soundtrack to my unruly state of mind!

Born Alone, Die Alone…

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While, some believe that people don’t really die alone, I have to call bullshit on that. Sure, you have your family and friends, who are there to mourn the lost of there loved one. Surrounding themselves around your canister, as they slowly dive you into the six feet under, where you will be forever, while you become the delicacy of many different insects and whatnot. However, that doesn’t mean that your loved ones will be coming with you! Well, maybe when it’s time for them to expire themselves, then yeah sure, but that might be long as fuck. I’m not trying to be morbid or dramatic about it, but all I’m saying is not matter how many people you have in your life. At the end of the day, you came into this world alone and you’ll leave it alone. So, cherish these people, memories and whatever it maybe, because those are the only things, that you will be taking with you. Which at the end of the day isn’t a bad thing, because it’s the memories and the love, that won’t make you feel so lonely where it is you end up!

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Down Boy

​Haven’t been around much, been to busy with deal with life and trying to get my shit in order. However, I’m still here and like I said before, I’m not going anywhere! Enjoy this video, as a hello again!

There’s More To Life Than This!

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After a slight nervous breakdown last week, which left me in a dark hole of nowhere, that no even the most power light could find the end of that endless black tunnel. I feel somewhat better about myself and I’m not lying to myself or whoever read this thing. I legit realized, that even though things weren’t what they seem to be (at least in my sad little mind), that doesn’t mean, that there’s any lemonade to be made from this experience. Sure, it took a lot of liquor, candy and crying like a little bitch to my friends to have this moment of clarity. However, as a good friend said to me “It’s sometimes the bad moments in life, which are gifts”! Now, while I might consider that to be bullshit, I took it with a grain of salt and just ate it up, because while all this shit maybe happening now. There’s some kind of reason why I can’t have what I want now, but when I do, I think that would be the biggest gift of all. I just can’t wait to unwrap it already!

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I see both sides

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The two-week dreamy dazed, that had me lying on a cloud, while imaging bullshit, that possible would never happen. Just slapped me cold on my face and told me to wake the fuck up and come back down from them clouds I called home for a nice minute. While, that possible of happiness might be nearby, I just thought I had it closer to me then my thoughts led me to believe. I had my drunken like goggles on and they fucked up my clear vision, that I became someone I never thought I could be. I don’t regret anything I said here or to my friends, I just regret, that my heart got to me so hard, that it messed up my brain and mind from telling me the truth. I can sit here and lie to you and myself saying, “Oh well”, but I’m just too proud to say, “This wasn’t the one”!

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In My Head!

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Inside my head, I have a world where I usually live in when I’m not living in the hell that is reality. I usually, get carried away in there and most of the time, I just get stuck there for hours, without realizing it. Maybe, I do realize this motion because, if I were slapped back into the real world, I would do anything to go back to that world in my head. Sure, not everything on top of there is all wonder-like and fun! Sometimes, it takes me into dark places or places were I’m not sure what to think anymore. Which sometimes fuck with my real universe and when the two worlds collide, it’s not a fun place to be in. Anytime, that happens, I try to find another shelter or world to move into, but there’s no place to hide really. So, I just have to face the two worlds head on, like an iceberg feeling of cold water, hitting me back into the world, I’ve come to enjoy and hate, and at the same time sending the land in my head back where it came from; to its rightful place!

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